i guess, he had already made up his mind.
i learnt, we've not contacted for the past 7 days.
i think, it's quite clear bahx.
i hope, he wont change his mind and look for me again.
i feel, i was attracted to him as i wouldnt need to stressed myself whenever im with him.
i like, his protection and the feeling whenever im with him.
i have, to try to let go
i need, to be happy
i cant, do it
i wish, all these din happened before
i want, it to end
i cry, for dat day
i've been thinking quite alot. alot of things which were quite silly. wad will i do if i've only left 4 mths to live on this earth.. haha. dont be sian diao. addiction to the one i've thought ytd, wad if im pregnant. oh dear. wad's wrong with me.
how i wished i could escape to HK or some other countries this time round again. up till now, i might be going to HK some time next week. but it's not comfirmed. if sis needs to go over to HK for another job interview, then the air ticket will be hers.
but why do i wanna leave? i wanna disappear in max's world. i dont want him to be able to contact me whenever he likes. and when i needed him, he ignores me. therefore, my foolish thinking was to let him know dat i'll be going to HK for 6 mths. by then, he'll be serving in NS. perhaps i'll feel better? but then, roughly 3 days ago, his msn nick was changed to, just me, myself..and max all alone in my world. oh great.
silly me
